Bra Blog

A while back I asked my blogger friends to let me know what kind of nursing bras they used, or recommended. I had horribly ugly ones with James, and they never fit properly. A few friends sent recommendations, starting with a website called "Breakout Bras". I fitted myself as per their directions, and ordered a few bras. I love these bras, so I want to tell you about them!

All three bras are by a UK company called "Freya". They are all pretty similar in style, just different colours and fabrics, and a few minor differences. You do have to order these bras using the special sizing chart, as they come from UK and are slightly different in size.

The first one that I got was the "Dotty" (black). It's VERY cute, and doesn't look at all like a nursing bra! It's always nice to feel cute and sexy, right?
Then I got the "Emily" (pink), which I bought a little bigger to use during the engorgement period. It still fits fine now though, and is very, very supportive. The straps and fabric don't stretch, so it really holds everything firmly in place.

The last one I got is the "Rosalie" (nude). It is soft and a little more stretchy, and has a slightly different styling than the others. It's more basic, but looks nice under t-shirts and stuff. The stretch is nice and comfortable - but still supportive for larger chests.

I totally recommend all these bras, and the website "Breakout Bras"! The prices were awesome, and they shipped all the bras for free.

Comparison Shot

Daddy with James, November 2006.

Daddy with Rayya, September 2009.

Truth About the Newborn Stage

The newborn stage is not my favourite, I'll admit it. As beautiful as a newborn baby is, and Rayya certainly is a beauty, the newborn stage is hard for me. I am very comfortable handling a newborn, and thankfully feel much, much more relaxed about her nursing and sleeping, etc. However, between the exhaustion of being up at night nursing, and the distressing cries of a newborn that come without explanation, I find it tough. This is not to say that this post is about complaining about my new baby! Oh no, definately not! I'd do this a MILLION times over again, just to have my babies. But it's simply me admitting that I do not handle the newborn phase well. I struggle with really embracing the moments, and at the same time wishing for them to pass.

Rayya is a fabulous baby! Of course, I compare everything she does to what James did - and she is a dream in comparison. The few nights that I have said were "rough" have really been a walk in the park compared to "rough" nights with James! Since day one Rayya has pretty much been on a 2.5 hour feeding "schedule", with a few bursts here and there were she nurses more. She nurses fast though, usually wrapping things up in 15-30 minutes max. (To me, that's fast compared the hour that James always took). She usually konks out and naps immediately following that, which I will switch around later to be awake time - but goodness, she's only 2 weeks old! She sleeps pretty well at night, with an occassional hour or so of just wanting to be awake - but happy! If that happens, I hand her off to daddy, who can sleep while holding her in a chair. I can't do that. She seems to handle my fast let-down reflex better than James, who had explosive poops throughout his entire nursing "career". Rayya handles it fine, and I of course am more experienced and use a few tricks to help her out. She loves to be bathed, and hasn't cried at all when getting bathed. She's bright and alert when she's awake, and seems to just now be interested in her soother. Until lately, I've been her soother! What else... um... she seems to have a bit of a witching hour from about 9:00pm - 10:00pm, when she just screams and cries - and then suddenly will just instantly fall asleep! I don't know if it's gas, or what, but it's pretty consistent every night. I never would have tried to keep James awake, EVER, but we do try to keep her awake during the evening for a while, because she sleeps A LOT. Last night was a typical night for her, down to sleep at 10:00pm, up to nurse at 1:30am, sleep, up to nurse at 4:30am, sleep, up to nurse at 6:30am and then slept until 9:30am.

Anyway, that's the latest baby rundown. I know it's a funny photo of her, I was trying to get one of her while she was awake!

James & Rayya

Some Pics

Big brother holds Rayya.
Four generations: Great-grandma Trudy Harris, Grandma Wendy Kroeker, Mommy Heather Plett and Baby Rayya Plett.

Such a good big brother! Here you see Rayya's splint - she has a "hip click", which is quite common and will be looked at this week to see how it's going.

A beautiful hat crocheted by friend Tannis Hiebert.

How Rayya Came into the World

To sum up Rayya's entrance into the world in two words, I'd say "unexpected" and "quick". I truly wish that all pregnant women could have labours & deliveries like mine. I actually enjoy and cherish the experience, and I'd like to do it just ONE more time - I think.

Anyway, how it all happened was like this. We had decided to stay home for the long weekend, even though it is the weekend where we traditionally go down to the States and stay at a resort with Ryan's family. I was just so uncomfortable, and feeling apprehensive about going, so we begrudgingly stayed home. On Sunday night I was a bit bummed that we had stayed home for nothing. I felt guilty, because I knew how much Ryan wanted to go to the resort. I had no idea of what was to come...

At about 3:00am or so (all times are somewhat a guess, because everything happened in a blur), I woke up and tried to roll over in bed. As I was helping my tummy over to the other side, I felt something give - like the feeling of pulling out a drain stop, kind of. I sort of panicked, because I thought I did something bad to myself when suddenly I felt a gush! I got out of bed as quickly as possible, stepped out of the bedroom door and suddenly I was literally gushing water all over the floor! I just stood there with what was probably a very surprised smile on my face - my water had broke! And did it EVER! Once the flow quit, I grabbed a towel to stick between my legs and went to get Ryan. He didn't believe me when I woke him up and told him my water had broke. We went back to the hall, and the water was spreading everywhere (old house, kind of leans to one side). It was flowing directly into my pantry, and various other locations. I wasn't having any contractions yet, so we started to mop up. The water found it's way through the floorboards, and was even dripping from the ceiling in the basement. So gross - but very funny to me! Thankfully the mattress pad soaked up the fluid I lost in the bed, and I put on some new sheets so that my mom could come and sleep there.

I called my mom to come, and started packing up. Everything was ready to go, so it didn't take long. We were on the road at about 3:30am or so. The contractions started just before we left, at 4-5 minutes apart and lasting 30 seconds. They weren't bad, just like bad menstrual cramps. I was so curious how far along I'd be at the hospital. We got to the hospital around 4:30am and the contractions were getting stronger, and about 3 minutes apart. It seemed like everything was taking so long! I had Ryan take me up to the 3rd floor in a wheelchair, because it was hard to walk. I had to do all the paperwork while he moved the car, and I was getting really annoyed with the receptionist who didn't seem to notice that I was very much in labour!

I got into triage at about 5:00am or so. When I was checked, I was 6cm dilated and the contractions were getting stronger - I just wanted to get into a room. We got into the room at about 6:00am. I got settled in, went to the bathroom, sat down on the side of the bed and things just started happening! The contractions got REALLY strong, and I felt I couldn't move. The nurse tried to talk to me about pain options, and was trying to encourage me to use the shower or birthing tub. Ryan just kept saying to her "this isn't going to take long, the baby is coming". She didn't really believe him until I said, "It burns and I feel I need to POOOOOOOOooooop!". She asked me to lie down so she could check me, and once on my back the contractions got excruciating! She checked me and I was fully dilated! She got a bit panicked then, trying to call the Dr. and telling the staff she needed help as things had progressed so fast.

She told me that at any time I could bear down and push, so I did! Thankfully the Dr. came quick, things got set up - and 5 minutes later Rayya was born.

It was so nice to be able to have her put straight onto my chest, and Ryan was able to cut the cord. We never got to do those things with James, as they quickly had to examine him right after birth. She stayed on my chest for a long time, and I just got to take it all in. I had absolutely no cuts or tears - just some "scratches", so that was nice! It went so smoothly, I was so happy!

After settling in with Rayya, Ryan decided to go downstairs and make phone calls. The nurses kept coming to check on me, and my bleeding. The nurse was checking my bleeding, and pressing on my tummy when I passed some fairly major clots. She called the Dr., because she was concerned about more clotting. Before I knew it, there was a rush of activity in the room! (Thankfully Rayya had nursed, and was asleep in the bassinett). I was hooked up to an IV to get some clotting medications into me. The Dr. then handed me the gas mask, and said "start breathing this". Um... why?! Well, to my utter dismay, she had to GO BACK UP THERE with her hand (almost up to her elbow) to take out the clots. Yes ladies, I can firmly say THAT was the worst thing I've EVER felt. Thank God it only took a couple minutes, and I breathed that gas like it was my life.

After THAT episode, Ryan returns thinking all is well to find me pale and the room a mess. Things did go back to normal after that, and the recovery was fine. We stayed in the hospital for 48 hours, and then came home as a family of 4 on Wednesday afternoon.

I'm sure there will be more to add to this later, but I think this pretty much covers the basics!

Introducing...

Our beautiful gift from God

Rayya Katherine Faith Plett

September 7, 2009 at 6:49am
7lbs 10oz, 19 inches

Congrats to Tammy Gigolyk who predicted a girl weighing 8lbs 8oz on the 7th!

One Year, One Week & One Day

That's how long it's been since our last little angel grew wings and flew to be with Jesus. I've been so preoccupied this past couple of weeks that baby angel No.4's birthday went unnoticed, and I'm okay with that. However, I did notice it a week later and decided I'd still blog about it. My last miscarriage was the hardest one, because it followed so closely after the one preceding it, and I was still grieving - and I LONGED to believe that God was going to give us that baby. Once again, God had other plans, and now I can see how the timing is still much better now. But I did love that little life, and was so very heartbroken to lose it. It was also the first time I cried going into the operating room for the D & C. I didn't want to be there at all, and it was almost as though I still didn't entirely believe that another one of our babies hadn't made it. The nurses were so compassionate, and wiped my tears for me as I slowly faded to sleep.
I don't know why I have to have 4 angel babies, but I do know one thing for sure - I am SO glad that I KNOW that I'll get to MEET them someday! When I get to Heaven's gate, and see four little angels running in my direction, it will all make sense. I can't wait to hold them and kiss them. For now, I get to lavish love on my earthly angels. Oh, thank God for my James and my Baby Banana! There is just so much, so very much, to be thankful for.

Proof

Thanks to Amber, here is proof that I have a husband and that we like each other! On the 13th we celebrate 6 years of marriage. I am still very much in love with my babe Ryan, and I'm so glad we're on this journey together. Amber, thanks for capturing this moment and sharing it with us. It's one of my favourites.

Surreal

This pregnancy feels so much more surreal to me than my pregnancy with James. I don't know if it's still the way my subconscious mind is trying to protect me from believing that we will actually have a live baby in our arms in a few short weeks. When I think about holding a little tiny babe in my arms, it just doesn't seem real! It just doesn't feel like it's really going to come to pass! Have you ever had that, where you plan an event, or a trip and when you try to imagine yourself there, you just can't? It just doesn't seem possible? That's how I feel. Even though I am VERY aware of baby's existence (I got a lot of stares in the mall today, some sympathetic, some in shock, some with smiles of knowing), and looking and feeling extremely pregnant, I can't believe a baby is there. Can you believe it? There is a sweet baby in there, just waiting to come out and meet us and be in our arms. I will have another love of my life to hold, to kiss, to nurture, to cherish, to lavish with love. My body will grow a "second heart", and I will somehow have the capacity to love another little one as I love my James. Hard to imagine loving two like that - James is our universe.
I don't know if I can entirely blame hormones, but this has been an emotional time for me. It's hard to put into words why it is so emotional. Perhaps because I know how close I am to holding in my arms a true miracle, and how I want so badly for this baby's life to be a testament to others of the grace, and true nature of the God I love. Perhaps it's because I pleaded to God for this baby's life, and to look into that face will be like looking into the face of Christ. Perhaps because of the many promises I made to my Lord and Saviour if only He would allow me to carry this baby. In any case, I have shed many tears over my children. Some tears of joy for their existence, and some tears of fear that I might fail them. My biggest hope is that my children sense and see in me a true relationship with Jesus. Not just a show, and not just a Sunday faith. I want them to see me in fellowship and relationship with Jesus every day, in all parts of my day. I want them to know Jesus because they see how I know Him. This is my prayer.
I can hardly believe that only 20 days are left until I see my precious baby. My arms long to hold this child so badly - the pain and waiting, the wondering and the praying, the tears and the joy - all worth that moment of being handed a new little bundle of blessings. I feel so incredibly blessed.
Baby Banana still has no name picked yet. This has been a bit of a struggle, as Ryan and I have very different tastes in names. Yes, we agreed on James' name, but this time around it seems like it's been harder to narrow it down. Truth be told, I really have only one name that I like and want - and in my mind I am often calling baby this name already! To me the name has deep meaning, and I love it. Hopefully we'll come to an agreement soon. Baby could be here any day!
I haven't take any new pics lately - it's been busy around here! Maybe tomorrow I can hire my sister-in-law to be my personal photographer and get some new ones taken.

Twenty Months Pregnant

Yes, that's right - twenty months pregnant. When this whole journey to a second child began, it was Christmas of 2007. Hard to imagine, isn't it? I was pregnant in December of 2007, and we lost that baby in January of 2008. I got pregnant again in June of 2008, but all of the months between January and June were potentially "pregnant" months for me - and I did things as though I could be pregnant. In August 2008 was the last miscarriage, and from August to December was the same thing. I lived each month as though I could be pregnant - avoiding vigorous physical activity, lifting heavy objects, avoiding most medications and alcohol, etc. Finally, in January of this year we knew that we were pregnant again. And as you all know, it's going well - and I am now entering month 9 of this pregnancy. PRAISE GOD! It's been a twenty month journey to get here... twenty months of being pregnant, then not being pregnant, and then the waiting in between. What a crazy rollercoaster! But no matter where I've been on that rollercoaster, I've sensed God's nearness to me. I am so very thankful for that. I am so very thankful to be where I am. I am so very, very thankful.

Lots to Say, Little to Say

I feel like I have a hundred things going through my mind these days - and yet I lack creativity and ambition to blog about it all.

The main thing is that James' room is pretty much done. The only detail left is that there is still a little bit of stuff stored in his closet that we need to go through, and the rug needs to be installed in his hideout. Otherwise, he is moved in. He had his first night in the big boy bed last night. I think it would have gone totally smooth, except that two people yesterday said to him that "baby is going to have your crib". We had been avoiding saying anything like that to him - just simply trying to make the big boy room and bed a big exciting adventure. I think that effected him, because at bedtime he wanted to go into his crib. After encouraging him, and telling him he would be a big boy now like his friends Emery and Levi (both 4) he was feeling better about it. I had to rub his back for a long time, but eventually he fell asleep. He had no trouble napping in his bed today at all. Tonight he went to bed a lot easier, and I only had to go in to remind him to be quiet - which was not indifferent to when he was in his crib! I am so proud of him, and it gives me a lot more peace-of-mind now that he seems to be mostly content in the new room.

In pregnancy updates, well... let's just say the end is nearing! I feel good, but at the same time I also am feeling beat too. Second pregnancies are very different! I feel today where I felt probably in my last week of (overdue) pregnancy with James. The joints are very loose, and give me a lot of discomfort. I'm not sleeping much at all, and blah, blah, blah... it's nearing the end, that's all I can say. I can't WAIT to meet our new little person!!! I'm SO excited about that! Ryan and I have not chosen an official name yet. I have MY name decided on, but we haven't had the official talk yet. We'll see what happens. Last night I had a dream about a name... one I had never thought of, and I don't know if it's relevant. Who knows!?

I also need some nursing bra advice. I have what might be called a "larger" chest than some, and need a really good supportive bra, with thick straps and preferably without underwire. Does anyone have a nursing bra they'd recommend? I used a Wonderbra one last time (with James), but they are too big now - so I am actually a little smaller than before. So I need to invest in some new ones.

Time to Take a Guess

Many of you haven't heard that Ryan and I know what Baby Banana's gender is. We have confided in a few family and friends, so obviously you guys can't guess at the gender. However, it's still open for the rest of you, as well as date and weight. Background info: James was a week overdue, Baby Banana's due date is September 16th. James was born at 11:18am. James weighed 8lbs 3oz. Here's my 32 week photo with James.

July: Past & Present

July 2007

July 2008
July 2009

Last photo courtesy of friend Jeremy Hiebert.

Why I Don't Sleep at Night...

This is me in bed, lying on my side. The best part starts at about 1:12. Don't mind the stretch-marky tummy. Most of those are leftovers from James!

How weird is THAT?!

(Couldn't help myself, had to add the theme music!)

Out of the Mouth of James

James: Why is the push mower in the dirt mommy?

Me: I think daddy put it there to be out of the way of the big mower.

James: Oh! Is that what the problem is?

After getting upset at James for not settling down in the car, James is crying and I am telling him he needs to listen to me...

James: Mommy, what would make you happy?!

Me: James, instead of pooping in your diaper, why don't you come and tell mommy when you have to poop? Then we can do it on the potty, and you won't have to have poop in your diaper.

James: No comprendo Mommy.

Yes, he ACTUALLY said that!

James: Bumpa, I have a question.

Grandpa: What is it?

James: I don't remember.

Grandpa: Is it stuck in here? (points to James head)

James: No, it's in here. (points into his open mouth)

Walking by an old cemetery near my parent's place...

James: What are those things? (pointing at the grave stones)

Me: Those are stones with people's names on them that went to live with Jesus in Heaven.

James: Oh! That's a good idea!

I had just picked up my cousin's foster baby after her nap, and walked into the living room where James was...

Me: James! Look who I've got!

James: *gasp* YOU GOT THE BABY OUT!

He Can Swim!

Okay, wasn't he JUST born yesterday?! And now he's swimming!

Baby Purchases

When I was pregnant with James I was totally pumped to do all the baby-related shopping. At the time we needed EVERYTHING, like crib, change table, blankets, clothes, towels, tub, sterilizer, blankets, etc. I loved getting good deals on that stuff, and I loved finding homes for everything and getting it ready for his arrival. As with James, I have also stocked up on some newborn diapers with some almost-expired coupons.

With this baby I have a lot less on my list, but I am still enjoying the preparatory purchases! I have bought a few blankets, mainly to replace the very obviously over-used ones. I've bought a few new sleepers, and BPA free Avent bottles to enhance my collection of Gerber Gentle Flow ones. I still have a few more things to pick up, like bottle nipples (do I have to replace them even if they are in good shape?), a couple of soothers (in the case that this one actually likes them), and washcloths - the ones I had for James stink, and look really ratty.

My two main purchases though were almost more for me than for baby. One was a Baby Trend Sit 'n Stand stroller. We use our stroller A LOT!!! That thing has put on serious miles, has travelled to Hawaii twice, and other various locations. I knew I would need something to haul my two kids around, but I didn't want a huge limo of a stroller. I did A LOT of research, did some test drives, and chose the Baby Trend. James totally loves the idea of being able to sit of stand, and the baby can rest in it's carseat. I am totally pumped to hit the road, or the mall, with this lovely ride!

My second main purchase was a new diaper bag. James' diaper bag is still in operation since his birth, but it is definately a little worse for ware at this point. I've taped the insides together twice with binding tape, and now that is no longer holding. It was time for a new one, so I decided to go high-end this time. With some advice from a friend, I went with a JJ Cole System diaper bag. It's smaller than my old one, but I think I can get used to that. It has a lot of other nice features that I will use - like the stroller straps, and the diaper caddy. I'm looking forward to using that as well. (And I got one that matches the new stroller!)

Although I have already mentioned it, my other favourite purchase is my baby carrier. I haven't tried it yet, but I can tell that I will love it.

Any second child purchases that I should think about? What did you get new for your second baby? How did you prepare differently with your second?

28 Weeks

These pics turned out kinda weird, and yet I like them!

28 weeks with James seen here.

Overwhelmed

I haven't been blogging much lately, for many different reasons. There are the obvious reasons: life is busy, it's summer, and we're outside a lot! So much stuff is happening, that I don't have time to blog about it all, and if I did - it would be one monstrous blog post!

Then there are the not-so-obvious reasons. One the of the reasons is that I am extremely overwhelmed these days. I have trouble with being overwhelmed at the BEST of time, but particularly now - when I am majorly nesting, and feeling the on-coming exhaustion of the third (and last!) trimester falling upon me, and my body. My body is definately noticing the extra strain, especially because I am also constantly running after my little buddy, James. It feels like there is SO much to do, and I'm running out of time. James' new room is far from ready, and I can't clean up in there and get it ready, and painted until it's time. And if his room isn't done, we don't have a place for new furniture for him, so that has to wait. And if there isn't furniture, I can start moving his stuff into there. And if I can't move his stuff into there, I have no good place to start putting the new baby's stuff. And if I can't do THAT... well, I'm just lost. I need to get these things done, AND SOON, because my energy is depleting, and let's face it - baby could show up early.

On that note, and now that you think I've completely lost it, I've also had to contemplate why I blog. Why do people want to read about my life? Why do I WANT people to read about my life? I admit that the blog has actually brought out a rather bad trait of mine. This is the need for verbal or written acknowledgment that I've done something well, or recognition of an accomplishment, a compliment - that kind of thing. I really have used this blog to fulfill my need for this type of attention. When the comments start to become sparce, my mood is actually directly effected. I wonder if I'm not an interesting enough blogger. Maybe my subject was boring. Maybe I just don't actually have that many friends. It gets bad. Then I find myself getting upset that the most blog attention I get is when I've miscarried. Are people feeding off of my misfortune? Secretly enjoying the journey through the pain and the suffering that goes with it? OF COURSE NOT. But these are the insane thoughts that start flooding my mind when I get hurt that "no one" is reading my blog anymore. Is my self worth starting to become dependent on my blog audience? If so, I need to take a step back. So anyway, that's where I'm at with that. I plan to continue to blog - but before I make a post, I have to mentally prepare. I have to make sure I'm doing it for the right reasons, and not just looking to be fulfilled with these kinds of written affirmations that I so enjoy.

In happier news, life is good. Other than the overwhelmed feeling I have trying to prepare for baby - I am PUMPED that we are merely 12 weeks away from meeting the little one! James has also been a blast, and I'm just soaking up all my time with him as my only child. The house is a mess, the yard neglected, the dust bunnies flying, but I am enjoying life with James and one on the way. We spend most of our time outside, and have a calendar packed with events before the arrival of the babe. I really just can't wait - and yet some part of me wants to pause this beautiful moment in time when I can dote all of me to James.