How long ago was it that I posted that Rayya is a good sleeper? I think I must have been delirious - perhaps from too much sleep from one or two good nights in a row, or perhaps from the lack of sleep. I'm not sure, but I recant that statement. Rayya is NOT a good sleeper, and hasn't been for a few weeks now.I'm still glad that she isn't as bad as James was in the sleep department. However, what makes her sleep issues worse than his is that:
a) I now have two kids to look after during the day, requiring more energy. One of them being three, and needing LOTS of energy.
b) With one kid only taking one nap a day, I don't have the option of napping when baby does.
c) One kid also needs meals made for him, and when I don't have the energy, I can't just say "Supper is up to you tonight, I'm too tired".
So, Rayya's sleep issues are really bothersome for me. I also am not a great person with lack of sleep. Even just a few less hours than usual makes me into a walking time bomb. I start to feel like I'm going to lose my mind, and everything bugs me. My patience disappears, and my ambition totally depletes. It's not a good scene. This mama needs her sleep! I'd venture to say that after a week or more with less than 5 hours of sleep in a row each night I am usually on the verge of depression - and that's no joke!
What she is doing is that she is no longer sleeping the long and beautiful 8-10 straight hours like she did a few months back. It truly was beautiful. Now, she is usually going down to sleep at 8:00pm, and waking anytime between 11:00 and midnight for a bottle (which I don't mind, usually I'm still pretty much awake). She'll usually fall right back to sleep, and then potentially be up zero to ten times between midnight at 4:00am. Usually, it just requires that I stick her soother in. But then it takes me some time to fall back to sleep, and it seems that usually as I am just getting warm and dozing off, she wakes up again. She used to often just fall back to sleep on her own, but these days she goes off like a fire alarm - loud and long! Then, I'll usually give her another bottle between 4:00am and 5:00am, because at that point it seems she is very adamant that she needs a bottle and not just the soother. Usually she will fall back to sleep, and then wake up anytime between 6:00am (too early) and 8:00am (decent). This is a frustrating sleep pattern, and I am not pleased. There is too much getting up. I don't know when she lost the art of self-soothing, and I don't think she is hungry.
I'd love to just let her cry-it-out now, but that comes with consequences, which is why I haven't done it yet. She doesn't cry much, but when she does, LOOK OUT WORLD! This girl has lungs. The crying is LOUD. It is much louder and emotionally draining than James' crying ever was. So if I let her cry, the whole household is going to be awake for the duration. I'm not a fan.
This causes me to sort of grin-and-bear-it for now, but I'll admit I'm not really succeeding at that either. I'm tired, and I just want to sleep a straight 8 hour stretch again. I can do ANYTHING with sleep like that, and tolerate a lot more too. I guess we'll likely have to suck it up and let her cry a few nights, even if that means we're ALL awake. Not cool.
7 comments :
It's so hard when you're not getting enough sleep! I absolutely hear you! When I had my second baby I instituted "quiet time" for the older sister when the baby napped in the afternoon. It consisted of sitting in her room or on the couch and looking at books or colouring or playing quietly. But the main stipulation was that she must do it by herself. Maybe some would say a 3 year old is too young for that. But I don't think an hour of playing alone is too much. It took a few days of reminders to make it work but it is a fantastic way to get a few minutes of respite or to take a bit of a nap if you need it. Sometimes mommy needs a few minutes to herself!
Oh Heather, I'll be thinking of you. I have never let a kid cry it out with another child upstairs. I let Isaiah cry it out at 5 months and boy was that hard but so worth it! I sat outside his room and cried for an hour 45 mins the first night.
What about giving james room time where you put on a cd and tell him to come out when the cd is done or to read books while you sit and read a book or rest on the couch?
Hugs, I love you
Uggh. I feel for you.
I'm struggling with that too. Riley was a terrible sleeper (your blogs on "cry it out" were a godsend) so I thought I was "owed" a good sleeper. Owen is better than Riley but not the rock star I was hoping for. It's so hard when you have a toddler and a baby who doesn't sleep. Owen sleeps for maybe 1 hour total all day and is still up anywhere from 2-6 times a night. I just keep reminding myself that this will pass and try to be the best mommy I can. Some days I think I fail miserably but I keep trying. I think that's all we can do. So I feel for you. And think of you sometimes in the night and wonder if you're up too...
Aw, Heather...I'm so sorry. I say that because I can completely empathize with you. Britta has been a brutal sleeper up until now, and she's almost a year old! Sometimes they just go through phases, which could be Rayya's deal. Who knows? But whatever it is...its hard. I kept telling myself this year, "it can only get better, it can only get better, it can only get better..." Well, it got worse before it got better...but we're seeing a light - FINALLY!
I have to totally agree with Rebekah. You NEED some time in the day alone - even if it is just for 30 mins to an hour. Annika went through a period where she wasn't napping during the day. But I MADE her stay in her room quietly. She eventually started napping again (Thank GOODNESS!). But if you can find a time in the day where both kids are in their rooms, so you can find your sanity before the last half of the day...you NEED that to survive!!!
I'll be praying for you, Heather. I know all too well what you're going through...and it is a lot tougher with 2 kids.
oh...i hear ya. my babies sleep issues have gone back and forth....eliorah WAS finally a pretty good sleeper (at around 11months) but decided at 18 months she was DONE with her crib and now...we are onto "other" issues....all which mean mama roo ain't gettin sleep.
and shiloh loves to get up between 5 - 6AM. i have tried everythng to get her to sleep longer...and one day...i am sure it will happen. but it hasn't yet....
be enouraged sister...i feel your pain.
So sorry Heather. Sleep is so important. Koen used to be so consistent with his nights, but then he stopped and started waking up multiple times a night for nothing except me to be there for a second. So frustrating. I started praying over him every night and asking specifically for God to fill the room with peace, keep Koen warm, and when he woke up, to let him know that I was close by and he could fall back asleep without me. It didn't happen overnight, but when it did, this Mama rejoiced in the morning! All the best!
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