Tuesday, November 23

Nightmares

Can you tell me if this happens to you? I go through periods of time where I cannot get rid of nightmares of bad things happening to my children, in which I'm rendered either helpless, or have to choose which one to save, or if I'll save myself and not them, etc.

It's definately the most horrible thing I've ever experienced as far as nightmares go. They started when James was a baby, and last for a few nights in a row and then go away (thank goodness). Even prayer doesn't always get rid of them - trust me, I've tried! They haunt me like nothing else can - and the visions stick in my mind all day.

PLEASE DO NOT keep reading if you are prone to these types of things as well. I just want to give you an idea of the nightmares I have. You can continue reading at the bottom.

Nightmare 1: Me and the kids survive a crash that lands us in a river in our van. I have to come up with a way to unbuckle them from their carseats, open the door, and swim to the surface holding both of them.

Nightmare 2: One or both children are kidnapped. Enough said.

Nightmare 3: I'm in a situation of the end times, where Christians have to profess to know God or deny Him. If I say I know Him, I will be expected to watch as horrific tortures are performed on my children.

Nightmare 4: One of my children has been kidnapped, and while in Winnipeg, I see him/her in the backseat of the car next to ours at a stop light. I get out of our car, and try to get them out - but the car doors are locked and it begins to get away.

In each of these nightmares, I'm left with the haunting visions of the last moments of my children's faces looking at me. I usually wake up and cry. I pray for our safety, and that I'll never be in a position where I would have to endure this kind of pain. Sometimes when the nightmares have been bad enough, I get up to go check on the kids and pray over them. Other times I have got on my knees, and prayed till morning. I'm going to continue to pray against these nightmares. Thankfully for now they seemed to have passed.

4 comments :

Domestic Bloggess said...

I have these kinds of nightmares every in a while. They terrify me at the time and Shane usually needs to wake me from them because I am crying and/or breathing very heavy as I am in distress. I too pray with every fiber of my being. Hoping yours stay at bay for a good long while.

Kimberley said...

praying for you...

Trev and Rebekah said...

Wow! I will pray. I wouldn't say I have nightmares but more thoughts like this that go through my head. My latest is the worry of what if something happens to Trev and I and my son is left by himself. He'd be all alone without a sibling. Or I worry about something bad happening to Trev if he goes running late at night or if he is away out of town and I wonder how my son and I will survive. These are all FEAR based and the Spirit of FEAR needs to be told to go to the pit and to never return and to be dealt with by Jesus. Thinking of you.

Carla said...

I don't have nightmares but I do have "thoughts" that pop into my head. When these come, I immediately say "Devil, I reject it" and then pray.