I love Facebook. I hate Facebook. Love it. Hate it. Every day I sway between the two, unsure if I want to continue to sit and look, or if I want to smash the screen in and call it quits.
I love Facebook when it's being used for it's original intention - to keep up with friends and family. I like seeing pictures of kids growing up, status reports on new engagements, new babies, fun trips, what the dog did in the backyard. I like to read this and that.
I hate Facebook when it makes me angry. When people pull out their soapboxes on topics like vaccinations, religion, the environment, etc. I hate it when I get hit with a barrage of stories about weight loss, what to eat, what not to eat, what to wear, what not to wear, what baby should eat, what baby shouldn't eat, what is right, what is wrong, how to have the best life, how to have the best marriage, how to have kids that are perfect, how to save money, how to be the best person on earth, how to use oils to make everything that you never noticed bothering you before disappear, how to make your kids happy all the time...
The list goes on. And on. And on.
I can't stand it anymore. I just can't read ONE MORE LIST of 35 ways to... fill-in-the-blank and improve your life. I feel like I need to start a huge wall, printing off these lists and try to accomplish them. ALL OF THEM. In one day, I need to get my life perfected.
I get so tired of this unspoken pressure. Read more Bible. Do more crafts. Eat better food. Exercise more. Don't wear makeup. Don't wear bikinis. Use coconut oil.
Can ANYONE relate to this?! Or am I the only person using social media, and feeling like I'm sinking in a sea of over-knowledge, over-information, over-improvement, over-advice? I feel done, anxious, ill-equipped. I'm just not able to pull off all these "best" ideas! What if I don't do any of them?
What if I just lived, exactly the way I am, the way I am comfortable, the way God leads ME?
What if... I didn't set up my kids with piggy banks that said "save", "spend", "give"? What if I didn't make eggs wrapped with bacon? What if I didn't do all 35 things to make my kids have the best summer of their lives?
Could they still have the best summer of their lives? Maybe they could. Maybe if mommy wasn't so stressed out about all the things I am not doing. Maybe it is time to worry about the things I am doing. Maybe I just shouldn't worry. Maybe it's time to just live.
I am so done with Facebook, and yet I can't let it go. I still love keeping up with friends, but it's likely time for a HUGE cleanup and "unfollowing". It's time to just live and be me, and teach my kids what I know, and love Jesus the way I do it, and eat some junk, and do life just like we are.
NOTE: Just as a note, I don't know who even reads these posts any more! I wanted to mention that I am not dissing the use of oils, or the people that use them and have had great success with them. Some days it is just a bombardment of posts about oils on my Facebook news feed, and when I have not yet made a decision about becoming an oil user it can feel like pressure. That's all - no hard feelings!
3 comments :
I love you Heather! I think we would be great real life in person friends ;) I seriously have these same thoughts every. single. day. With Instagram too. Except half the time I get sucked into to try some of those things too.. and usually they don't work anyways. I've wanted to give facebook up so many times and just can't do it. Proud of you for sharing your feelings and writing this.
Heather - I am so with you on this topic.....I think you are a great mom, and I love seeing you walking with your kids. STOP beating yourself up and keep on being you.....you are kind, caring and a great writer. I love how you are open about stuff like this....keep being you, and stop comparing....Jesus made you the way you are - and he loves you! That's the most important thing.
I love you, my friend & I love reading your posts.
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