"This morning I did my all-dreaded cleaning the bathrooms. I don't know why I hate doing that so much, I tried to change my attitude and prayed the whole time I worked. I thanked God for my home, bathroom etc. That helped, but I also began praying about our current theme of questions these days, like hearing from Him, knowing His will, and feeling confident in hearing that. So, I just admitted my confusion, my desire to live and behave according to His will to please Him. Suddenly I just became quiet before Him, and it came to me, 'What makes you think you have the RIGHT to hear from Me whenever you choose?'. Oh boy. Firstly, I had to admit that I, Robin, am 'expecting' to hear from God at the drop of a hat. The GOD of the universe, creation, salvation, grace, mercy and love has done SO SO SO much for me. He loves me unconditionally, His grace has covered me, and I am a child of His. I suddenly felt a little ashamed for expecting to hear from Him so instantly and with my own discretion. Like I should be able to text message him or something. Ha ha! Like seriously! I think God has things in HIS control, why do I feel the need to hear my future from Him? Is that my last attempt to gaining peace of mind/control over my life? I think God can speak to me, no doubt! But I don't think He's going to tell me my future. And that is probably a good thing. Secondly, I had to ask myself, 'How do I know this is from God now?'. Then I thought 'Do I feel condemned by this?' and I thought 'No, I don't'. But I do feel a fresh prespective and a new desire to place my trust daily in Him. To 'Let go and Let God', and to resume my growth as a Christian. All the while, I need to remember that hearing from Him is a GIFT and not a RIGHT."
2 comments :
That's neat - I don't often think to pray while I clean, but it would probably make my attitude better!
Thanks for your comment on my blog. I appreciate your honesty :) That should be pictures of your little baby at 14 weeks too. And I thought of you several times when we thought there were twins, since I remember you mentioning that one of your miscarriages might've been twins.
You're in my thoughts and prayers. I'm trusting God that he already knows your future children and when you will hold them in your arms.
I miss my walks with you and Robin!
How was the game?
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