Saturday, August 26

Too Big or Too Small?

It never ceases to amaze me how people are so willing to comment on the size of my tummy - especially when they ask if I'm carrying twins! I got a few more "wow, you're really big" comments this week, and it started to make me worry - even though at my appointment on Wednesday I measured perfectly, and the doctor said my progress was perfect. My worry got me into some online research about size, and I found this article that really explained things well, and gave me peace of mind. I even Googled "28 week" images to compare myself to other people! People seem to make comments based on their own pregnancy experience. Everyone's bodies are made so differently, and those differences are enhanced during pregnancy. In my case in particular, I have several factors that play into why I seem to be carrying "larger" than others might. Here are some of those factors:

1) Body weight before pregnancy. I am not a skinny person, and also had extra weight on my body from my previous pregnancy. This could make me look larger than a person who is quite slim and pregnant - but for some, this could have a totally opposite effect, and a larger person would hide their pregnant belly better than a slimmer person!

2) Narrow torso. I have a very narrow torso (the space between my chest and hips). There is not a lot of room for the uterus to expand vertically, so in my case it expands horizontally - pushing out the front!

3) Deep curvature of the back. I have a very deep curve in my back. When I lie flat on the floor, I can fit my entire arm between the floor and my back. This means that I am really pushing out the front with the baby, and that much of my internal organs are also being pushed to the front.

4) Abdominal strength. I'd be the first to admit that I don't have great abs! Not only did I not have strong abdominal muscles pre-pregnancy, but I also had already stretched them out a little bit during my first pregnancy. Both of these factors could contribute to why my tummy so readily pushes out - there is little muscle there to hold it in!

5) Heredity. My grandma, and my mom both carried "out front" and had large bellies - but only had 7-8 lb babies. I have been blessed with the exact same build as my mom's family, and will likely have a similar pregnant size - which will be big, apparently.

I am putting this on here today to encourage any other pregnant women who might be getting comments about size. Whether you are being told that you are too big, or too small, those comments can be hurtful and can cause someone to worry unnecessarily. You do have to remember that your doctor knows best, and you really only need to worry about what their opinion is. Have a happy, worry-free pregnancy, and let your doctor be the one to tell you if you have anything you need to be concerned about. If you are pregnant - I hope you feel beautiful as you carry a beautiful miracle from God!

8 comments :

dee said...

You are right, all women carry differently! People expected that I was ready to give birth at any moment when I was only 26 weeks pregnant. I was asked daily if I was pregnant with twins! I was in maternity clothes when I was 8 weeks!!
Heather, you are beautiful and so is your pregnant belly! Baby is growing and healthy and that is all that matters! (by the way I'm Esther's sister)

Amber said...

(((sigh))) Heather, God is growing your belly and your baby at exactly the speed he wants :) Peoples comments can be hurtful (and rude!) and often they (myself included sometimes!) don't realize the effect their words will have. People are so different...not only in pregnancy, but personalities, likes & dislikes etc. I, for one, grew Hailey on the inside more and was often told how tiny I looked. I don't think there is a way around stopping people from commenting on size while a person is pregnant. Sift out what you don't want to hear (hee hee, easier said than done!) smile and nod and only listen to the people who tell you your belly is beautiful. Because it is.

andrew + camille said...

i personally think you look GREAT!!!! you are a beautiful looking Mom!

Warren & Liane Thiessen said...

GREAT POST!!!! I think your looking great!!!!
Thanks for making your blog so interesting!
I am 9 weeks pregnant and can get a lot of helpful stuff off your blog! :)

Jamie said...

I think you are the perfect size for 28-weeks :) You look great!
I agree that your previous pregnancy probably paved the way for you to pop out more - I am finding that I am growing much sooner this time around. I am pretty short and I feel like I get SO round when I'm pregnant. Tall people have more room for the baby to hide but those of us with short torsos have to let it all hang out...

Nin said...

aw....what a beautiful post. Thank you for your encouragement. I'm not sure why everyone has to be such an expert about pregnancy, and why everyone has to be so concerned and caught up in size...myself included. Why can't we just be joyful in our growing belly, we are growing life!! For pete's sake, when will we stop thinking about weight and start thinking about the amazing work God is doing! Man, I needed this post today, thanks so much. I just got another unnessessary comment today, from someone who's never been pregnant. When she looked at me she said "wow, did you ever get big!!!!!!"......I didn't even smile and replied with a sharp "well, that would be what happens when you're 9 months pregnant". I think I made her feel a little dumb, but come on people! Enough already! I feel big every time I look in my mirror, why do I need you reminding me? I pray that I'm open to the ministering of the Holy Spirit today, after reading your post, I pray that He would come and settle that last paragraph into my heart.
I'm so glad that you're not allowing other people to bring you down. And it's been so amazing to watch you take every moment of this pregnancy with complete joy. Your spirit is one to be admired. You will make an amazing mommy!
Your belly looks great, actually, it looks completely PERFECT.

Trail Rider said...

This is definitly one of my peeves! THere is enough in our society to cause eating disorders and poor self images! Everyday, we are bombarded with "what you should look like" and how much you should weight.....

How in the H-E...double hockey sticks (pardon my french) did a pregnant woman get lumped into the pressure of a certain body image???
How is it that a LIFE, A CHILD, A BABY is getting fat? How is a big belly....WITH A BABY INSIDE considered to be a bad thing???
I don't get it. Whenever I'm pregnant, I usually snap back and make them feel silly for saying stupid things. (which isn't very christlike...)
Maybe this go around, I can not let it get to me and kindly remind our crazy society that being pragnant is the greatest miracle ever.
you are beautiful!
It just so happens I am within 4 weeks of 2 other friends that are very "weight concious....I'll need God's grace to get me through

Drea said...

I d ont think your to big at all.
Dont let others comments bug you. I know it can get hard sometimes... I had someone say "hey fatty" to me on sunday. I knwo they were joking... because right after saying it they said "you eating ok..." and were concerned I hadnt gained enough weight.

Still the "hey fatty" remarks do stick and can bog us pregnant women down I think.

You look great tho. Nice and round tummy! hehe Those are the cutest!